Civilisational Foolishness

 

Australians are slowly learning many ancient lessons the hard way. Like the high cost of living alone, especially as you age.

They call it the singles tax:

"Singles tax costing people hundreds of dollars a month...

“That concept is known as the singles tax – the idea that single-income households do not benefit from the same cost-sharing benefits when it comes to things like rent and bills as a couple does.

Australian Bureau of Statistics data suggests a single person spends more than $770 extra on living costs a month compared to a person in a couple.

Brisbane financial advisor Michael Khouri said there was also the time and effort factor to consider, as well as that inability to share resources.

"If somebody's single and they're trying to do everything themselves, they're usually a bit more time poor," he said.

He said he also saw people who had just come out of a separation struggling to fund separate homes – either renting or buying – especially as the cost of housing continued to rise.

"Fifteen years ago, I'd find that probably half or maybe say 30 to 40 per cent of their expenses was housing — and now it's just getting higher and higher."

More than half of Australians living alone are women, and around half of those women are aged 65 or older.”[1]

I know a lot of people do not have sympathy for a lot of boomers, but I can’t help but see a perfect storm brewing in this area. Many of these older people, over 65, were born and raised in one of the most prosperous economic booms and times the world has ever seen, in one of the most prosperous countries the world has ever seen, and amongst some of the easiest conditions the world has ever produced to help people get ahead.

They called this country the lucky country for a reason. Because we really were better off than most in so many ways, and it was also evident that this prosperity was more a result of luck than anything else.

Now, consider the disaster coming for many older men and women who were forged in that sort of benevolent economic environment, thinking they can easily tank their marriage, or burn their families connections, because it has always been relatively easy to rebuild yourself in this country. A lot of these people have a rude shock coming, and I think the rest of society has to recognize this as well, because the political power of this demographic is still incredible and will be for years to come. Australia is about to be hit by a poverty wave that will likely set this country on track to be something like the new Argentina in a few decades, or close to, if things are not addressed very quickly.

This sort of situation should be rare anyway. People are not really meant to live alone. We are meant to live in large, often multigenerational, households. This sort of family arrangement was always a shelter from financial burdens.

But Australians got so rich, beyond the wildest dreams of our ancestors, that living alone became cheap, easy and common. At least for a time, and only when economic windfalls were ticking up. But this sort of culture is really a house of cards. Once things get tough, it becomes hard for people to live alone. Especially on government handouts.

Because people were really not meant to live this way. It is an aberration, a product of a hyper-individualist society with short time horizon preferences. In other words, our society is filled with stubborn people who cannot think ahead.

The saddest part for me in the article is that this woman says she fears she might have to move in with her adult daughter. Why is this a fear? Because our culture has made this an undesirable thing.

But really this should be a no-brainer. How much family wealth is chewed away from people across our country, because families that could live together and would have once done it without thinking in the past, are each paying for rents, regos, their own rates, electricity bills, etc, etc, when people could live together and prosper.

If you pay attention you will note that a lot of families that come here from Asia, or Eastern Europe, or other places don't hesitate to pool resources, and they build wealth this way. Why? Because they drive down their costs for all sorts of things in their life. Life is done better in community. It is just wisdom.

Australian culture really has been hollowed out. An older man or woman with kids should never even have to think about not being able to pay rent.  It should be unthinkable, except in the most extreme of circumstances, "Honour your mother and father" means primarily to make sure they are never destitute. But we should not forget, that it was the older generations who taught the younger generations to break this generational safety blanket, and go their own way and now we have countless people in desperate situations that just did not need to happen.

List of References

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[1] ABC Business, 2026, https://www.msn.com/en-au/money/government-support-and-welfare/singles-struggle-to-afford-housing-as-cost-of-living-rises/ar-AA2dHarz?ocid=msedgntp&pc=NMTS&cvid=6ac6ec1dfc26404888200d4ef6474e70&ei=42&fbclid=IwY2xjawU0AjdleHRuA2FlbQIxMABwZG9mAWJyaWQRMXFjTWpNZEtkZzM3aFpoTnRzcnRjBmFwcF9pZBAyMjIwMzkxNzg4MjAwODkyAAEeLj4jbExbaJShsVHqpCeLJ2FWcBOKBbvofNrbZDwmzbbA5WSHDgsfhdMAgJ0_aem_JDCHrX24gWIviv6FlvYrGw

Your Wealth Is Not For You

 

I knew a researcher once who was studying the long-term effects of daycare. In their research, as they told me, they found that the earlier parents put their kids in childcare, the earlier those children as adults would put their parents in aged care.

What goes around, comes around, right.

I have read research that shows that day care for more than a few hours a week is known to cause long term behavioural and emotional issues. Researchers have known this for decades, and yet the data was actively suppressed, because it went against the narrative of equal work for men and women being good for society.

We have all seen how predators are running rampant through day care at numbers people are so shocked to hear about, that they compartmentalize it and ignore it, because it is too frightening. But Australian state governments have been in the process of tightening laws because they are aware of how widespread the issue is.

And I have observed that most of this information will wash over many parents for a few reasons:

1)     They might literally have no other choice, because of their situation.

2)     They might feel like they have no other choice, even though they do, they just are not capable of seeing it.

3)     Daycare centres are so common and so much a part of our culture that herd mentality just causes people to use them without really thinking deeply about it. This is common behaviour for humans, even though just a generation or two ago we thought differently on this issue, behaviours can become accepted as the norm very quickly.

4)    The idea that "my kid is the exception" causes people to ignore the data. But the data does not say some kids do well in daycare, it says all kids suffer behavioural and emotional issues after a certain amount of hours. Your kids might handle that better than others, but the environment is not the best place for kids, even if it is a well done daycare.

5)     The idea of restructuring your life around avoiding daycare is so hard to consider, that even giving the idea time to think about is just not possible for many people. Life is already hard enough as it is, right?

I feel for those who would prefer not to use daycare but have no other choice. I understand the financial trap many are in. I get it. Older generations have handed you a pretty broken economy and society. I think we older Australians, which I am quickly getting toward being one, have a responsibility to seek to recreate a society where people are not forced into this position, as much as possible. As I get older, I think much more about the legacy I will leave my children and their children, than anything else.

A righteous man's wealth is meant to be to the benefit of his children's children, not himself.  

 

How To Handle A Difficult Wife Part 4 – Sex and Bonding

 

Sex.

This is one of the more important aspects of marriage. In this article I am going to look at this topic from a different perspective to either my previous articles, or what you are probably used to.

According to Forbes a lack of intimacy is the fourth largest reason for divorce, sitting behind lack of family support, infidelity, and right alongside a lack of compatibility and too much conflict.[1] When you consider that both infidelity and lack of compatibility largely overlap with a lack of intimacy, then you would have to conclude that this is a much larger reason for divorce than this graph indicates.

[2]

I have been known to say in sermons that a sexless marriage is a contradiction in terms. God created marriage to be a sexual relationship. For instance, Malachi 2:15 says, “15 But did He not make them one, Having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore take heed to your spirit, And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.” God designed marriage to be a fruitful sexual union that bears children, and that is why he makes man and wife one; physically and spiritually. This teaching harkens back to the Genesis 2:24-25 which says, “24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.” And both passages point forward to 1 Corinthians 7:2-5 which says,

“2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. 3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

Sex is central to what marriage is. Of course, in this fallen world, through injury or sickness, this aspect of marriage can be broken. But this does not change the fact that marriage is and was always meant to be a sexual union.

Of course, as many men and some women will tell you, sex can dry up in marriage over time. This is not a controversial idea. We all know this happens. What many people may not know is that it is not uncommon for this to be a case of the man not really wanting to touch the woman. The stereotype is the sex-starved man and the ice-queen wife, and this stereotype is probably more common than the other way around. However, in this day of porn addiction and low-testosterone and other reasons, it is not unheard of to have wives wishing their husbands would touch them. In fact, this is not even something new, as I just finished The Canterbury Tales recently and this exact kind of situation features in one of the tales.

But as I have said all along; this series is more about prevention than curing problems. It is far easier to build a good relationship with your wife from the start than it is to turn around a bad situation. Of course, some of the principles will apply both ways, and so they may offer some men in difficult situations some hope and a reasonable path forward, but this is an area of your marriage you want to steward as wisely as possible from the start, otherwise it could really come back to bite you hard later in your marriage.

Men, has anyone ever told you how having good sex with your wife will improve your marriage? Note, I did not say, “getting good sex.” I said, “having good sex.” There is a difference; a big difference, and an important difference.

A lot of discussion about sex in marriage contexts, at least in Church circles and the secular circles I am aware of, is focused around how women can please their husbands by being more available, being more willing, being more adventurous, etc. And yes, having a wife who is willing to be sexually available is a massive advantage in this area. In fact, if you are one of those men whose wife has a higher sexual libido than you, or even close to, you have lucked out…or perhaps you have not? Maybe you have simply been doing something right? You know the saying, “You get more flies with honey than vinegar.” What do I mean by that?

Well, it is simple: if you are lazy, selfish, or too self-focused in your sexual relationship with your wife, why would you be surprised if things dial down over time? Now, don’t get me wrong, I know that in every marriage sexual attention can come in waves, there are times of serious busyness like when kids are really little, there are times of sickness, there are times when you both might just quieten down and things become less consistent. I understand all of this, and I encourage you to pay attention to the natural rhythms of life and be adaptive with your spouse…but herein is the point: One of the ways men can go wrong in their marriage and help to turn their wife into the difficult wife is how they approach this area of marriage.

Sex is not a gift for men and a duty for women. Look again what the Apostle Paul says, “3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband” (emphasis mine). Notice what Paul does not say. He does not say, “Women, your husband desperately needs your sexual attention.” Rather he says that both men and women should render each other affection. Why? Because both men and women are created to desire affection and to receive and give affection.

We have gotten into this strange mindset in the modern world that says men are way more interested in sex than women, and maybe there is some truth in this, especially considering how much media is geared to revving up men’s sexual desire. However, if you read old literature, especially medieval literature, but also some other ancient literature, you will see that many of the ancients just assumed that women were more interested in sex. Paul, though, he cuts through this by indicating that marriage is meant to be a mutual affection environment. He addresses the inherent desire for affection in both sexes. All Christians are meant to live by the principle: “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” How much more married couples with each other?

Men, do you look at your wife and think of her as simply an agent that owes you affection? Or do you look at your wife and see someone who is owed affection, that you want to be affectionate with, that you want to be intimate with for her joy, not just your own? Because, this makes a massive difference, and what Paul says here in 1 Corinthians 7 helps to create this basic standard of wisdom; marriage is meant to be a mutual benefit environment.

If you approach the sexual part of marriage simply from the perspective of your sexual gratification, you wife will work out pretty quickly how you really view her, or at least how you appear to view her through your actions. Women are pretty intelligent creatures, men, and they will work out very quickly when you are simply wanting to use them. Some women will even put up with that over time, because of loyalty, because of natural affection, or duty, or other reasons. But you will likely be turning down her desire for sex and affection just a little bit more every time you do so. There will likely come a day when that tap runs dry. I often wonder how many men in sexless marriages were very selfish lovers early on?

Research backs this up as well. Though research shows men are generally more interested in sex than women, men and women still give roughly similar reasons for turning down sex. These reasons usually revolve around other relational issues.[3] Psychology today notes,

“Although sexual desire has biological underpinnings, the initiation of sex and responses to sexual overtures have little to do with individuals and have much more to do with couple dynamics. Furthermore, when we categorize one person in a couple as having a low sex drive, we are ignoring the gamut of interactions that might be affecting their interest in sex. Consider, for example, how much—or how little—you’re attracted to your partner when you’re in an argument or are focusing on work or a child-rearing issue. Psychological distractions can make us turn away from romance and toward other issues occupying our headspace.”[4]

In other words, other issues going on in the relationship are generally the underlying cause to why sex might dry up over time. I am not seeking to address all of those causes in this article, only one in particular: how you treat sex with your wife, men, makes a difference to her desire. If you treat sex with your wife as simply about you and not about her, over time you will train her to not be as interested in sex. People eat chocolate because they like it. Some people might avoid it for health and weight reasons, but when people eat nice chocolate they don’t really need to be talked into it. Why? Because they like it. Our bodies are designed to respond to things which bring us pleasure. Anyone who rides a motorbike knows that there is a physical joy that comes form riding that thing, and that is why you get back on it, this is why people get addicted to exercise as well. The same is true for other things in our life, including and especially sex. When your wife enjoys it more, she is more likely to desire it more.

But this also goes with other types of affection as well. Remember there are other ways to be affectionate, men. Hugging, kissing, sitting on the couch, doing other things together builds up physical connection as a habit. If you shun these things over time you will create physical distance between you and your wife and this will affect the bedroom.

Our bodies are designed to bond. Remember what Genesis 2 says, “24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.” “and they shall become one flesh.” This obviously speaks to physical connection and probably more, in fact I think Malachi 2:15 makes it clear that this connection has a spiritual reality to it as well. But science and medicine can speak to the physical aspect,

“Sex triggers a powerful chemical feedback loop that literally wires your brain to feel attached to your partner. During sex, the brain releases oxytocin, often called the bonding hormone, into several key areas involved in learning, memory, and reward. That oxytocin then activates the brain’s dopamine reward system, flooding it with the same feel-good chemical involved in eating your favorite food or achieving a goal. The result is that your brain begins associating your partner with deep pleasure and comfort.

This isn’t a one-time event. Each sexual encounter reinforces the loop. Oxytocin stimulates dopamine release, which in turn strengthens the neural pathways that encode your partner as a source of reward. Research in both animal and human models shows that mating increases dopamine activity in both men and women. Over time, this creates a neurochemical foundation for pair bonding that exists alongside, and sometimes independent of, conscious feelings of love.”[5]

Our bodies are designed to give us intense feedback to the world around us. Sex is one of the most intensely pleasurable things you can do with your body in this life. This is one of the reasons it is so dangerous outside of marriage but so powerful within it. It is literally designed to glue a man and a woman together relationally, so that they actually crave being with each other. Over time this becomes much more than just craving sex, it becomes craving connection and affection from your specific spouse. There is a reason that adultery feels like such a betrayal, because it actually breaks something physical between a couple and impacts your spirit. You feel the betrayal in your bones and in your soul.

Now, properly stewarded, men, this sexual nature of your marriage is a powerful way to keep your wife’s affection, attention and loyalty. You will likely desire sex more than her. Which is why there is wisdom in making sure she enjoys the experience as much as possible. But also note that if you act badly in your relationship, if you break this sexual bond through neglect, porn use, infidelity, hurting your wife, demanding of her in other areas of your life more than you should, or in other ways, you can actually train your wife to feel like she does not need you. Guys who give their attention to porn and ignore their wives sexually actually train their wives to not pursue sex; talking about shooting yourself in the foot, with both barrels. If she comes to the conclusion that sex is just a way to gratify you, and then on top of that if she comes to see you in a negative light for other reasons, this is where many men and marriages find themselves in a world of hurt.

Suddenly a man finds himself in a situation where he is seeking help because his wife will not touch him. Or worse, she has told him that the marriage is over because she no longer feels the need for him in her life. She knows how much he enjoys sex, but for her it was an imposition from an unloving man, who did not really (from her perspective) cherish her, so why should she care? I am not justifying her making that choice, I still think that is wrong, but you have to understand, men, that you can contribute to pushing your wife in this direction, if you are not wise.

Once you are in this situation it is hard to turn around. Even if your wife is a Christian, she can find women who will affirm her in this decision. She will find pastors, or pastor’s wives, who encourage her that she is doing nothing wrong. You now have an uphill battle to win her affections back, it can be done, but it is more difficult. But for younger men starting out, or who have not yet started out, make sure you don’t start down this path, otherwise it can go very bad for you and your marriage.

We read in Proverbs 5 these powerful words,

“15 Drink water from your own cistern, And running water from your own well. 16 Should your fountains be dispersed abroad, Streams of water in the streets? 17 Let them be only your own, And not for strangers with you. 18 Let your fountain be blessed, And rejoice with the wife of your youth. 19 As a loving deer and a graceful doe, Let her breasts satisfy you at all times; And always be enraptured with her love. 20 For why should you, my son, be enraptured by an immoral woman, And be embraced in the arms of a seductress?”

Now it is possible to simply read this from the perspective that men should you avoid adultery and have sex with your wife, instead, because this is wise. Solomon is saying here: do not tire of your wife. But I think it goes further than that. I would like you to notice that Solomon writes that a man should not tire of “delighting” (ESV. V.9) or being satisfied in his wife’s body. In other words, he argues that you should find pleasure in finding your wife’s body to be wonderland, to use the phrases of a corny song from I remember from my younger days. Does a woman want to be rejoiced in? Does a woman want to be satisfying? Does a woman want to be a delight to the eyes of her husband? Does a woman want to be someone her husband pursues and desires? Yes, yes, yes and yes. Solomon does not talk about simply gratifying yourself with your wife’s body, he speaks of mutual pleasure.

And if that is written too subtly in Proverbs 5, then turn to Song of Solomon where he literally makes that case much more explicit. We read there how the groom delights in exploring the body of his beloved bride,

“1 Behold, you are fair, my love! Behold, you are fair! You have dove’s eyes behind your veil. Your hair is like a flock of goats, Going down from Mount Gilead. 2 Your teeth are like a flock of shorn sheep Which have come up from the washing, Every one of which bears twins, And none is [s]barren among them. 3 Your lips are like a strand of scarlet, And your mouth is lovely. Your temples behind your veil Are like a piece of pomegranate. 4 Your neck is like the tower of David, Built for an armory, On which hang a thousand bucklers, All shields of mighty men. 5 Your two breasts are like two fawns, Twins of a gazelle, Which feed among the lilies. 6 Until the day breaks And the shadows flee away, I will go my way to the mountain of myrrh And to the hill of frankincense” (Prov. 4:1-6).

The Bible spends more time than most would expect on the sexual nature of marriage, and part of its teaching is mutual pleasure and delight. Men, of course, there are other things which are really important for you to do in your marriages to steward your wife well, and in a loving way. But this is one of the very important ones that is not often spoken about.

How much you lay with your wife is between you and her. Different couples will have different rhythms, so there is no use being prescriptive in this area. Work out a rhythm that works well for both of you and that is regular. But note, that the better you devote yourself to helping this be an area that your wife looks forward to the better this will be for your relationship. Don’t neglect it, don’t abuse it. Note also that looking at porn can destroy this overnight, so shun that stuff. If you have a loving wife, who believes the Bible and wants to fulfill her role in mutual affection, and you steward this well, you will go a long way to helping yourself from every having to deal with the difficult wife.

Till next time.

List of References

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[1] Christy Bieber, J.D. and Adam Ramirez, J.D. 2024, https://www.forbes.com/advisor/legal/divorce/common-causes-divorce/

[2] Ibid.

[3] Michelle Drouln, Ph. D., 2022, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/love-online/202202/in-sexless-marriage-who-s-blame?msockid=2652711681de61e7277a647085de6fbb

[4] Ibid.

[5] Science Insights, 2026, https://scienceinsights.org/why-do-couples-have-sex-the-science-behind-it/

Foreign Dependence is the Problem

 

I remember many years ago, probably as far back as 2013 maybe 2015, listening to a Sky News discussion and the host had Labor and Liberal representatives on their show.

He asked them, "Does it really matter that we are getting rid of fuel refineries and car manufacturing?"

"No." They both said. "We can get what we need from Asia."

I remember thinking, "How can they be so dumb? What happens when war comes along?"

I never forgot that interview, because the retardery of what these representatives both said burned a memory in my mind. They were ok with a policy that made Australia's position in the world more precarious, more dependent. 

I no longer think they were dumb, I think they were corrupted, either by ideology or something else. You have to be very shortsighted to think that being dependent on other countries for basic commodities that make your economy move, literally, is a wise move.

This fuel crisis is 100% the fault of the two major parties and their short-term thinking. They worked hard to make us exposed, because they could not think ahead, or were the given incentives not to think ahead? Remember this at every election for the next three decades. Because these political parties have zero intentions of fixing a crisis they manufactured.

Labor is addicted to pushing us towards reliance on China, which every thinking Australian can see will end badly. EV's might be a short-term fix. But reliance on other countries is the problem, not the solution. That would simply leave us exposed to other forms of potential crisis.

The LNP is addicted to being a damp squib, utterly useless at fixing Labor's bad policies. They seem to be more afraid of being uninvited to inner city dinner parties than doing the right thing with resources. Though at the state level in QLD we see some movement in the right directions.  

But at the Federal level neither of these parties should be forgiven for their mismanagement of this country. Forgiveness is for individuals, not political parties. They need to be voted out of all levers of power and influence, so that sensible people can come in and change our country's direction.

 

Not Quitting Isn’t a Skill

 

Bear Grylls, on his social media, speaks to one of the most important realities of being able to succeed at virtually anything in this life:

“The best piece of advice I ever received about resilience didn't come from a book.

It came from the first SAS officer I ever met.

I was crazy nervous before Selection. I didn't know if I was strong enough or fit enough to make it.

He pulled me aside and said:

"Everyone who attempts Selection has the basic mark-one body: two arms, two legs, one head, and one pumping set of lungs."

Then he tapped his chest.

"What makes the difference between those who make it and those who don't is what goes on in here. Heart. That is what makes the big difference."

Skills can be taught.

Fitness can be built.

But heart? That's a choice you make every single day.

When people around you are quitting, make that the reason to give more.

Have a great Wednesday. Take care of each other.”

Amen. This is true in so many areas of life:

Family

Career

Ministry

Writing goals

Etc, etc.

Not quitting is not a skill, it is a decision. It is a decision you make every day, in fact more than that. You might have to talk yourself out of quitting your job, your marriage or your ministry many times in a single day. And it is worth the effort to do this, because once you come through the time of trial you will have been transformed in ways that you would not have, if you had quit.

Whenever someone quits something they were determined to succeed at, it leaves a mark on them. That does not mean there are never times to stop trying with something. I worked out very quickly into my PhD studies that I did not need a doctorate in theology, that I did not want to work in academia (especially after I had seen what it was really like in today’s world), and that I could better use my research and writing skills in other ways, which I have. So, I understand that there are times when we do not need to complete something. But this decision left a mark on me, it helped me to understand more about myself, and because I took what I have worked on and turned it into a book I could publish it left a positive mark.

But when people quit something they really wanted to succeed at and leave behind them nothing but loss, it leaves a different kind of mark. We all have that from some point in our lives. I think every now and then about what would have been different in my life if I kept pursuing footy. Probably not a lot, however I will never know for sure. But when it comes to a marriage, or an important vocation, when you look at people who have quit these, then you see how much it can harm their path forward. It leaves a mark that they carry with them the rest of their lives, a negative mark. Because they made a decision to quit, when they know they should have kept going.

This decision to quit damages their resilience to other situations in their life. It leaves them with a mark of failure, and they know it. Of course, to a large degree they can heal and succeed at other things, but the mark will stay with them.

Whereas sticking at something when it is hard helps us to learn the strength to face other difficult things. But, as I said, this is not a skill, it is a decision. It is decision to want to keep going.  

My kids see me do some form of exercise everyday. Everyday, unless I am sick, of course. I said to them the other day, do you think I always feel like exercising everyday? One them answered yes. But I said, that of course I don’t want to, I’d rather rest, and not have to worry about exercising, but how else am I supposed to stay strong?

We have to make the decision to keep at something. I encourage you today to think about this.

 

 

Relearn It, We Must

 

Her divorce may not have been her fault. Though most divorces are initiated by women, so she likely took the plunge. Still  he might have been intolerable, and I don't mean that he was messy, and forgot her birthday a few times, and watched too much sport on the weekend. I mean he might have been a down right mongrel. So, there is that possibility.

But the reality is divorce has been too easy for too long. Waaaaaaaay too easy.

Most people divorce over minor issues. Normal relational issues. Even for more serious ones, like infidelity, people used to be more willing to piece things back together (which of course is hard to do, I understand). But now divorce is as simple for some people as changing cars. In fact some people keep their cars, longer than spouses.

Our government and our culture made divorce way too easy, and now God had decided to take that ease away.

Those who don't learn from wisdom learn from experience. He is making our easy going, way too easy to blow up marriage culture, experience much more hardship.

The young will look upon this, and fear, and recognize that you cannot just treat things like marriage as throwaway things. They will likely be made wise by the experiences of others.

It sucks, though, how many people will be hurt by our society relearning this lesson. But learn it we must.

It’s Better To Have…

 

Marriage failure is not the worst thing that can happen to a young man in the relationship scene.

Never having had a chance to live your life with the woman you love is far worse.

Even if it were to fail, you would have gained so much from that marriage. Even some kids, probably. And a lot of other good things if you approached it well.

Too many young men today, because of bad, mad, social media advice fear the wrong thing. They fear that their relationship might fail, rather than fearing that they never took the chance to succeed.

They fear more that they might lose half their assets, rather than consider that they built something with another person. Which is one of life’s greatest privileges.

Now, of course a marriage break up is not fun. This is true no matter which side initiates it. I have seen enough divorced people in my life, through my ministry, to see that many of them have the same look of woundedness, the same shattering of confidence, the same presence that speaks to a great personal failure. Some display this less than others, some more, but I have observed it in all of them at some point. So, I would never say that a marriage failure is not awful.

But the person who has never pursued a relationship with a woman they are interested in has to live with a deeper wound: they lived the life of a coward, and that is worse, much worse, than even a marriage failure. Don’t let it happen to you.

 

Degrading Art Degrades A Society

 

I am looking forward to seeing how all the usual big-eva crowd pump out article, after article, and social media post after social media post, about how Translan is actually a good thing, it is only a small part of the movie, and then promoting some feminist spin on the story. Which is exactly what they did with similar issues in the recent travesty that is called Nolan's The Odyssey.

Of course, they will only do this if the movie turns out to be successful, because then they can ride the wave of popularity. There are so many leaders in the church who are so desperate to seek the approval and aplomb of the left-leaning culture. Or, others will promote it because some of them are paid to shill for it, because this does happen as well.

This is the level of disrespect our society gives to Christian things, when Christians take disrespect and tell everyone else to lap it up.

The way they got behind the subversion of the Odyssey will encourage more travesties like that.

To those who say, "It is just a movie." Do you still not understand how important art is to the soul of the culture? The greatest work of art in history, bar none, is the Bible. It has spawned countless lesser works of art, all to some degree reflecting its glory. These works of art speak to grander truths that shape how a people thinks about itself. It is a well known historical field of study that art reflects the state of a society, and our society is clearly not in good shape.

There are few more successful ways to demoralize a culture than humiliate it through art. This was practiced by the Soviets who founded a massive movie industry in Communist Russia, but this has been known since ancient days. The Assyrians used art to crush the fighting spirit of their enemies. Egypt, Babylon, Greece, and Rome, all used it to inspire their societies to greatness. There is a reason conquering armies always smashed the artworks of conquered peoples, it is a way of tearing out their hearts.

In fact, one of the worst things about evangelical culture is how bad it is at producing art. It was not always this way, once we had great artists, Lewis was one of them. But somehow the spirit of artistry has vacated the Protestant churches. The result has been an inability to capture the heart of society.

And now they are in the process off degrading the legacy of our greatest Christian artists.

 

Feminists Were Always Crazy

 

Because we live in a day and age where bad hair dye jobs have caught up with feminist sensibilities, we tend to think that earlier waves of feminists were more reasonable, and more sensible.

But no, the first wave feminists were not the saner feminists. As Helen Kendrick Johnson writes in the 1890’s:

“I copy from the "Salt Lake Herald" a few sentences taken from an interview with Mrs. Cannon, State Senator elect. When asked if she was a strong believer in woman suffrage, she answered: "Of course I am. It will help women, and it will purify politics. Women are better than men. Slaves are always better than their masters." "Do you refer to polygamy?" was asked. "Indeed I do not," she answered. "I believe in polygamy. My father and mother were Mormons, and I am a Mormon…. A plural wife isn't half as much of a slave as a single wife. If her husband has four wives, she has three weeks of freedom every single month…. Of course it is all at an end now, but I think the women of Utah think, with me, that we were better off in polygamy…. Sixty per cent. of the voters of this State are women. We control the State…. What am I going to do with my children while I am making the laws for the State? The same thing I have done with them when I have been practicing medicine. They have been left to themselves a good deal…. Some day there will be a law compelling people to have no more than a certain amount of children, and the mothers of the land can live as they ought to live." This is the character and opinion presented by the highest State official that woman suffrage has as yet given to the United States. Comment upon it seems unnecessary, so far as it would be needed to express the disgust of the majority of American women at such sentiments and such a situation.”

From Woman and the Republic, Helen Kendrick Johnson.

Insanity was always a mark of feminism.

There are many things that I could draw out from this short passage quoted here, but this stands out the most for me, “What am I going to do with my children while I am making the laws for the State? The same thing I have done with them when I have been practicing medicine. They have been left to themselves a good deal….” Why do you think Paul said that older women need to teach younger women “to love their husbands, to love their children” (Titus 2:4)? Because, if they are not taught this women will quickly abandon their children to follow their careers and desires. Paul saw this in his day, we see it in our day, this woman brags about doing this.

Feminism was always an attack on the family. It is dyscivilisational. It is to individualism what petrol is to a grass fire on a hot day, an extremely dangerous accelerant. People were already selfish, sinful, and given to going their own way, this is a part of the sinful human nature, the flesh corrupts our approach to life. But feminism took that and supercharged it, for women and men. Now, we live in a hyper-individualistic culture that sees any containment by gender roles and duty as oppression. But the individual is not the basic unity of society, the family is. Feminism was always, from the very start, simply a means for bad women to seek to sunder themselves from their God-given roles and responsibilities and also be given the chance to bring many other women along with them.

Now, we live in a day where so many men and women live adrift in a broken culture, and this ideology is one of the core reasons for that.

 

 

Hardship is Coming

 

The first round of record oil prices earlier this year burnt through oil reserves of many countries and also through the financial buffers of many people and companies.

This round?

It will break people.

In the 1970's the world oil markets were sent into major shock, because the US chose to support Israel over all the Arab oil producing countries, after they demanded Israel surrender land it took in a war. So, those countries strangled the world of oil. This started the fuel efficiency and green energy target movements. Rather than stay out of Middle Eastern affairs, the US decided to back its greatest ally and try to invent new technology instead of humbly accepting it did not rule the world. The whole world suffered as a result. There was mass inflation in the West, mass starvations across the third world, and industry after industry died and was offshored because energy became too expensive for things to be made in the West. Because the US used its power the way it did.

Now it is doing something very similar.

Fuel prices were dropping just a couple of months back. But then the war was re-escalated. Now we are all paying the economic price for the hubris of one country believing it has the right to determine what should happen far away from its borders.

I have been encouraging people to prepare cheaper transport, and pay down debt, as this war was always destined to escalate. This stupid, unnecessary, and completely avoidable war, is going to strangle many places of the basic resources they need to function.

Hence, much of how we lived will now be stripped away, by pure cost. Are you prepared to cut back? Have you been preparing? Are you ready to help others?

We can't change what foolish leaders in charge of foreign governments do. We can't get through the thick skulls of the religiously retarded ON BOTH SIDES that support this war because of bad theology and bad religion. We can't even look forward to good, responsible government from our own national leaders, as they have been working hard to make us exposed to this exact sort of problem, and have ignored every warning that this kind of energy crisis was inevitable.

But we can cut back and prepare to help people around us. Both these approaches will be increasingly important in coming months.

Are you prepared for coming economic hardship, because I believe we are about to see economic problems really escalate.

There is No Perfect Time

 

Vox Day notes on his Sigma Game Substack about the passivity of Delta males,

“But the passivity and reactive behavior of the Delta is absolutely within their control. If there is one thing I have observed that seems to hold Deltas back more than anything else, it is their narcissistic desire to have the universe time everything according to their preferences. They simply don’t seem to understand the concept of a window of opportunity.

Sure, it’s important to finish a task already underway. But does the task absolutely need to be finished now? The task will still be there tomorrow, the three women at the bar will not.

There is a reason why carpe diem has remained valid and relevant for more than 20 centuries. It is because most people simply don’t, even when they have the ability to do so.

So remember, the right moment is always now.”[1]

This is so true.

I have seen this sort of thing so many times.

Don’t wait for opportunities, make them. Take advantage of the opportunities that come your way. Never wait for the perfect moment, life is not a movie.

This is how so many young men today remain single well into their 30’s wondering why they still are. It is simple, in a lot of cases, you were so single-mindedly focused on some particular task, that you were likely doing very well, that you did not realize that the pretty woman who kept asking your help or your opinion needed neither of those things, but kept coming back anyway…she was seeking to get your attention, and you completely looked past it.

Or, you might have noticed it, but you were waiting for the right moment to ask her out, and never did, and finally someone else took their chance and you are left out in the cold.

I have seen a woman pine after a man and then marry his friend, because the friend actually asked her out, and that won her over. She did not jilt the other man, because he never said a word to her, because the time was not yet right.

I have seen a beautiful woman working alongside single men, a woman who is still single long after it makes any reasonable sense why, because these men never felt the time was right to ask her out. Thank God for this too, in one situation, because my wife was one such woman, and I saw her and took my opportunity straight away.

This principle is really true in many aspects of life, not just relationships. But this is the area where many men just keep shooting themselves in the foot.

There is no perfect time, at least not in most people’s situations. There is just windows of opportunity, and closed doors. Take your opportunities, what have you got to lose?

List of References

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[1] https://substack.com/home/post/p-215643412

Free The British Isles

 

I once would have been horrified at the idea of the UK breaking up. But today I look forward to it, because I know it will be better for all the nations involved. I am the Son of an Englishman, I want to see the Englishman live free again, but as long as he seeks to dominate other nations, the law of imperial decline with rot England to the core.

Here is a comment I wrote about a similar issue which serves to explain why I celebrate this. Ireland should be ruled by and for the Irish. Scotland by and for the Scots. Wales by and for the Welsh, and England by and for the English. Empire which is what Colonialism is, always ends with the core nation suffering the loss of its identity. I was asked if I made any distinction between the Colonialism of the English compared to the more violent conquests of the ancient Greeks, Mongols and other societies. Here is my response, which is relevant to this discussion:

I would say the difference is more one of degree. Colonialism is not new. The Greeks had both connected and independent colonies that went up into what is today modern Russia in the B.C. era. In fact, it is incredible how far the Greeks spread out. It was not always through violent conquest, like with Alexander, but sometimes they set up trade cities and the like along ancient trade or sea routes. Their most successful trade city, Byzantium, became Constantinople a city as famous and powerful as Rome, in its own way.

So, I would say some empires and some colonial efforts are more violent than others. The ancient Persians were less vicious than the Assyrians and Babylonians, especially the Assyrians who were famous for their cruelty even in the ancient world where cruelty was more common. The Mongol invasions were more vicious than most. If you had to choose between English conquest and Mongol conquest, I would choose the English variety.

Settling barely populated or unpopulated islands in the pacific is obviously very different to defeating and taking control of another settled society. Completely unpopulated islands are up for grabs really, though you will find yourself in territorial disputes with other nations over time. But the impacts of empire/colonialism always create the same results.

The cycle goes like this: A nation becomes prosperous and militarily adventurous. It then seeks to take over trade routes, and in turn it then seeks to dominate countries along those trade routes. Settlers follow the military and they take varying degrees of control over other nations, and this sends wealth back to the core nation. This leads to success and this success attracts people from across the empire back to the core. As a result, the core nation loses its national identity increasingly over time. Over time more and more foreigners rise to power and direct the resources of the core to their preferred interests, and the natives of the core nation are increasingly sidelined. The core degrades as resources are directed elsewhere and it loses its importance, as this happens the empire degrades, and another rises to take its place. This is a consistent cycle.

This is so consistent we could call it, if such a thing exists, a law of history. Because of how God refers to it in the Bible, I see this as a spiritual punishment for a nation arrogating itself over other nations. Every nation that so arrogates itself does so primarily for their own interests, which leads to varying degrees of oppression over other peoples.

Of course, this does not mean everything these empires do is bad. Rome bought roads and civil law and structure over most of Europe. Greece bought advanced philosophy and a common tongue. Britain brought English understandings of natural rights and justice to many peoples, and broke with world convention by seeking to end things like the slave trade, a truly marvellous act. But the end results always finish up in a bad place for the host nation.

Hence, a massively declining empire like Britian should learn from this and give up what it does not need and focus on the core people's their state exists to serve. There is nothing wrong with letting a former colony stand on its own two feet. This is how many nations have been born.

In fact, homogenous nations usually lead to some form of success over time, then become heterogenous empires and then those empires break down into new and constituted homogenous nations. It is a cycle of history. It is better to relinquish power than be forced into submission, which has happened to many empires.

Of course, in the past there has been great efforts to keep the United Kingdom together. I hope that whichever way this goes, that these nations would rise again to greatness under the banner of the Lord Jesus Christ.  

Update: they have met and have demanded independence referendums.